My favorite new parenting resource and web site is "Self-reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life" by Stuart Shanker self-reg
He also teams up with Raffi to offer a free song download to help children learn to self-regulate. The web site also has a toolkit for educators. Stuart explains the difference between self-control and self-regulation. He also talks about the importance of distinguishing between misbehavior and stress behavior. If a parent or educator responds to stress behavior with some of the common tools for misbehavior it can actually make the child more overloaded and the situation worse. I am doing self-regulation groups in kindergarten through grade 3 right now and these resources are very useful.