Happiness is a Choice

"Happiness is a choice. Be happy." That's the essential message of Yabuki's picture book.  To illustrate life's struggles and the actions that can help them seem less daunting, she presents a series of photographs featuring a small, whitish rock named Ishi, with dot eyes and a mouth that changes to reflect its mood.This book encourages others to choose and share happiness. This book can be used in a variety of groups such as emotion regulation or social skills. After reading and discussing mindfulness the story, group members can make their our own rock friends that could remind them to be happy and spread kindness. 

February is Kindness Month

This is my new second grade lesson on compassion featuring Heart Bubbles, another book by Dr. Krantz. It seemed very appropriate this week because it was Random Acts of Kindness Week and Valentine's Day. I particularly like that it has a focus on self-compassion. Just like you can't make friends unless you like yourself, it is hard to show compassion unless you take care of your own wellness (another opportunity to talk about the importance of positive self-talk, healthy eating, and sleep hygiene).  BACK is the mnemonic Dr. Krantz uses in the book to remember the key points. I have that printed in the center of the worksheet and they draw and label an act of compassion they can do for themselves, animals, others, and the earth. I think kindness is one of the most important things we teach our students.

Make Your Heart Happy. Spread Kindness!

This is the video I show in first grade.

Why Group Counseling

In order to “sell” stakeholders small groups should be a major part of the responsive services offered in our programs, we need to be clear on “Why Group Counseling.” Most counselors can explain how small groups are structured but to convince stakeholders why a student should participate we need to be clear on the why ourselves. At my school my part-time counselor and I run as many groups as time permits and need demands because we believe small groups are the best responsive service school counselors can offer. I was a classroom teacher so I enjoy teaching tier 1 lessons, especially now that we are using evidence-based materials like Second Step and MindUp, but I know that 15-20% of the students could use more help with social emotional development. These are the students who can benefit from tier 2 groups and there are 1-5% who need tier 3 groups (remediation and extra support).  Tier 3 groups and individual counseling typically address problems of living like illness of a family member, separation and loss, and grief.

Most of the groups we run are psycho-educational and focus on specific attitudes, skills, and abilities. They focus on typical areas of growth and prevent more transitory difficulties. Group members like the recognition that several others are experiencing the same developmental issues that they are. Yes we could work on these in individual counseling, but our ratio does not make that feasible. Besides we believe students learn from one another not just the counselors. Groups are ideal for improving communication and socialization. They also are extremely useful in fostering a sense of belonging and understanding. They promote development of positive interaction. Many of our groups focus on the need to increase self regulation and coping with difficult emotions.

Another reason why we offer groups is they provide exposure to a common set of skills but are flexible enough for each member to set an individual goal and work on it over the life of the group.

Once a teacher or parent is familiar with the small groups we offer they understand the WHY. However, for new staff and parents new to our learning community it is important to explain why a child might benefit.  We also work very hard to insure there is no stigma or record kept of group counseling participation. We want children and adults to see most groups as prevention and others there to support students who are experiencing some challenges - not that the members of groups have any identified mental health issue or specific disorder.

The Bucket Squad

Bucket Filling it is based off of Carol McCloud's Have You Filled A Bucket Today? book. McCloud has authored 5 books in total about Bucket Filling and Tom Rath has also written a book entitled How Full is Your Bucket? For Kids that I share with students in groups as well. It has been around about 20 years but Lisa Hansen, an elementary counselor, published a curriculum of 10 lessons with reproducible activities through youthlight.com in 2015. I have used activities from The Bucket Squad in small groups but they also support the themes of self-esteem, kindness, empathy, and compassion that could be used for a grade level or school-wide if teachers buy in. A nice feature of the curriculum is a weekly parent/teacher update and tips for each session.

Kindness Book

Maria Dismondy has many great books to use in counseling and for parents to read to reinforce social emotional development. As a counselor I am asked a lot about how to help siblings resolve conflicts and treat one another respectfully. Some of the students who are very kind to peers at school fight and fuss with siblings. This book is published available http://mariadismondy.com/ and will be available at Amazon soon. I can't wait for my copy to arrive! If you can't wait on her website the author reads the book aloud. She also has a Reader's Guide and coloring sheet. While you are on her site check out her other fabulous books like The Juice Box Bully, The Potato Chip Champ, Pink Tiara Cookies for Three, Chocolate Milk Por Favor!, and Spaghetti on a Hot Dog Bun.

Appreciating Happy Experiences

The MindUp Curriculum from the Hawn Foundation teaches the physical, emotional, and cognitive benefits of reliving happy experiences fully and mindfully. Remembering a happy memory releases the "feel-good" chemicals in our brain that flooded it at the time of the actual experience. When teaching that appreciating happy memories can help overcome sadness and insecurity, I use the delightful children's book Harry the Happy Mouse (2015) by n.g.k. Harry helps a Frog, but asks the Frog to repay the kindness to someone else. The book follows the good deed as it moves through other characters, who each selflessly help someone else, making themselves feel happy in the process! There are coloring and games that go with the book at harrythehappymouse that I have used with English Language Learners. But for my tier 2 first grade group my activity sheet for this session comes comes from a resource I have used for close to 10 years from MARCO colorful-counseling-with-cd/ by R. Sheritz Sartori & R. Hood Herrman. The Happy Memories sheet is from the Loss section of this worthwhile resource. My first graders in my Emotion Regulation group which we call "All Feelings are OK" enjoyed writing, drawing, and sharing 3 happy memories. They were visibly happier when they left the counseling office than when we began group!

Kindness Rhyme for Kids - You Are Amazing!

This is a good short video that emphasizes being kind to self. I use it in grade 2.

Effects of Kindness on the Brain

There is science behind teaching children to be kind, about empathy, and practice compassion.

Researchers at the University of Wisconsin proved that training students in compassion that involved practicing on loved ones, themselves,strangers, and finally someone they had conflicts with for 7 hours makes them more likely to act with compassion edu/brain-can-be-trained-in-compassion

Kindness Boomerang - "One Day"

This is the video I use in my fourth grade during the kindness lesson. Students respond well to the concept of passing along random acts of kindness without the expectation of anything in return. The also like short videos, especially those with music. I think this one definitely enhances my lesson and makes it more likely to "stick" with the students.

Kindness in 5 Words

Since today is ValenKIND Day I had my fourth graders summarize the big ideas we talked about kindness in 5 words. They did a good job writing about mindfully choosing to be friendly and caring with no expectation of anything in return.

For my lessons in the other classes I made a half sheet with a great example for them to formulate their Kindness in 5 words.

Happy ValenKIND Day!

Our SCA is currently spear heading a kindness challenge that includes randomactsofkindnessweek,  I am always happy to collaborate with the SCA and grateful I am not the staff member in charge. I call today ValenKIND Day and will be reminding everyone to be kind to themselves, those you love, and those who need love!

College/Career Readiness #NSCW17

ASCA wanted school counselors to promote college and career readiness today, the last day of National School Counseling Week. I don't ask my students what they want to be when they grow up (today's sign) because many will do jobs that do not currently exist. We promote the exploration of the 16 career clusters and talk about all postsecondary options. Staff and students are encouraged to wear college gear the first Friday of each month that students are in school. Staff is proud to show off their favorite college(s). I am in the picture with our library staff and their beautiful bulletin board!

Choose Kindness Theme: Books Kindergarten - Grade 3

Our district has adopted MindUp and Second Step as the foundation of our tier 1 lessons because they are evidenced based. Both curriculum encourage the use of literature to supplement the lessons. MindUp has a strong emphasis on optimism and lesson in both the K-2 and 3-5 curriculum to teach gratitude and kindness. Here are some books to reinforce the MindUp definition of kindness which ties it to mindfulness. Kindness means caring about or helping someone or something. It is a mindful choice. In kindergarten and first grade I teach 2 lessons on most themes (20 minutes) and 1 lesson (30 minutes) in grades 2-5.

Most kindergarten students perform small acts of kindness frequently. I use this book to talk about what it looks like and sounds like to be kind (see Anchor chart). There are other ideas that you might use for extension activities like may a class book how_can_i_be_kind_unit_intro.pdf The "Be Kind" handout has students draw and label a heart with what kindness looks like and sounds like.

For my second lesson on kindness in kindergarten I read What Does It Mean To Be Kind?

I am fortunate to have a PTA that buys me the books for my lessons but if you do not own this book there is a good reading youtube.com/whatdoesitmean For lesson plan ideas for this book check out kindnessadventure

Kindness is Cooler Mrs. Ruler shows how a teacher makes a difference when she stops mean behavior and then reinforces acts of kindness. Since I do 2 lessons in first grade on kindness the first time I have the children draw and label two picture of ways to be kind at home and schools. Again if you are not lucky enough to own this book there is a good reading of it at

youtube.com/watchKindness is Cooler

MindUp encourages using pleasant memories to prime the brain for happiness and to be kind. I use recalling a happy memory as the hook for my second lesson on kindness in first grade illustrates very quickly how one small random act of kindness can spread like a ripple. In my second lesson identify who they can be kind to - they are encouraged to list self, people they know, and the larger community.  The handout explains the lesson to parents (top paragraph) and asks them to write a happy memory. This is a very good lesson plan to guide discussion of the book OMary.pdf

I used Ripple's Effect last year for the first time to teach kindness to second grade. I used materials from ripples_effect_lesson_plan to supplement the MindUp curriculum.

Each Kindness is a wonderful book that also talks about how an act of kindness can spread and missed opportunities to be kind. There are several resources for lesson plans for this book but this is the one I use for third grade each-kindness

Choose Kindness Theme: Random Acts of Kindness (RAK)

The counseling program theme for February is Choose Kindness. We use MindUp mindup.org/which emphasizes optimism, gratitude, and kindness. The definition for in the MindUp curriculum for K-2 is "Kindness means caring about or helping someone or something. It is a mindful choice." In the 3-5 curriculum the definition is "Kindness is a mindful choice to treat someone or something is a friendly,caring way." I like how theri definition blends mindfulness and kindness.

If you want to do a schoolwide Kindness month checkout  simpleacts.org/kindness-month Another great resource for kindness is randomactsofkindness.org/ It gives educators great ideas about how to bring kindness into the classroom. We do RAK week based on their materials and highlight RAK Day of February 17 nationalday

Choose Kindness Theme: Reading About Kindness Makes Your Brain Happy

Reading About Kindness Makes Your Brain Happy

The Counseling Programs theme for February is Choose Kindness. We are implementing MindUp by the Hawn Foundation this year and the curriculum includes some good lessons to promote optimism, gratitude, and kindness. It makes the connection to mindfulness by teaching Kindness means caring about or helping someone or something. It is a mindful choice. This bulletin board was designed by our talented School-based Sub who makes most of my bulletin boards. It displays the covers of books that appeal to kindergarten through grade 5, including some of those I read aloud in K-grade 3. Kindness makes the doer, recipient, and observer of the act happier. We wanted to make it easy for children to find books about people who choose kindness.

Kindness Tree

Here is our beautiful Kindness Tree: Acts of Kindness Make Me Bloom adorned with the hearts our kindergarten and first grade students did in response to this month's lesson on kindness. The kindergarten students made a pink heart with an act of kindness for their family to take home and a red heart with an act of kindness to do at school that is displayed. The first graders drew and labeled an acts of kindness for home, school, and the community. Our wonderful volunteer made the 3D tree and the roots are burlap.

Kindness, Positive Psychology, the Power of a Smile

This book addresses bullying but focuses on the use of positive psychology to combat it. It relays the message that happiness is a choice and a smile can change a negative environment into a positive one. The author, Shawn Achor, is a researcher on positive brains and success. Learn more about him at goodthinkinc.com

RAK Week

In all my kindness lessons this month I touch on the message of this quote. Today is the start of Random Acts of Kindness Week. Smiling is contagious so smiling at a person may change their whole day and ripple out to countless others. Kindness elevates the level of dopamine in the doer's brain ("Helper's High"), the receiver's brain, and the observer's brain. The other message I deliver in every class is BE KIND TO YOURSELF. With the 5th graders I introduce the idea of self-compassion http://greatergood_selfcompassion

Kindness Lesson

Kindness is the theme of the counseling lessons this month in kindergarten through fifth grade. Above are the materials from my first grade lesson based on the book Kindness is Cooler Mrs. Ruler. It teaches about being kind to others in a variety of settings. At the end the students label and draw an act of kindness toward family, at school, and in the community.  The hearts will go up on our Kindness Tree bulletin board next week.