Let's Talk About...Your Fears and Worries

I see lots of students who struggle with stress and various types of anxiety. I recently purchased this inexpensive card game to use in individual sessions. The cards and spinner (wheel) can also be used in emotional regulation groups.  The deck is 101 cards to hep kids and teens change their irrational automatic thoughts to thoughts that are realistic and helpful. This is a skill that needs practice which is what this game is designed to do. The Wheel of Relaxation is used to help players practice relaxation and self-calming techniques so that they can more easily face their fears. The spinner can also be used as a stand alone tool. If you don't have a similar game in your office already, this is one you might want to purchase.

Use of fidgets and other stress tools

Here is a picture of my new supply of cool fidget tools. I have a whole box of stress balls. We allow students who want to use a fidget tool to use one in class only after they have signed a contract. We use the Responsive Classroom approach so I wrote a description and contract about using the object as a tool not a toy. This has helped regulate the use of these items. We ban anything that makes noise, is messy, or too distracting to peers (like spinners a few years ago).  The Monkey Fidget is my favorite because it is small, quiet, and has a marble inside that the student can simply push back and forth inside the small mesh sleeve. The one draw back is it is small and many of the students who need a fidget also are the same kids that loose things easily. We make the students leave their fidgets in their homeroom. We supply fidgets to our special teachers for use in their instructional spaces. I personally believe most of our students could self-regulate and not need fidget tools if we could provide a second 30 minute recess but since that is not going to occur we continue to try to find tools that help children focus. I would rather have them use a fidget I provide that tie their shoelaces together - that used to happen at my former school that did not have a budget for fidgets.

Flexible Seating

Our whole school offers students flexible-seating options to assist with self regulation. It is a good fit with our Responsive Classroom approach. Children have different needs and preferences. When students come for individual counseling I let them sit anywhere they want: 1) on the floor; 2) in a bean bag chair; 3) on an exercise ball; 4) on a wobble stool; and 5) in a chair with an exercise band. To introduce the seating options for my small groups I use interactive modeling to set clear expectations and then we review them with anchor charts. I have 3 sizes of the wobble stool and it I have to remind students they must be able to have their feet flat on the floor to use a wobble stool to be a safe choice.  If students are not using the flexible options appropriately (spinning on stools or kicking the bands loudly) I just say they have made a choice not to use that option for the remainder of the group session. Fortunately I have only had one student throw a fit when asked to move to a chair.  I like having similar choices and expectations in my office as in our classrooms so I can help students figure out what works for them.

Mindfulness Resources

At the beginning of this school year all our pupil services staff in elementary and middle schools were trained in MindUp mindup.org At the training they recommended having a mindfulness resource display in our offices. I had all my books on my easel but was very happy to get this "free" rack that was in the teacher swap pile this morning (as we are cleaning and organizing our rooms at the end and beginning of the year we share anything we don't want anymore).  My favorite books to read to students are "Peaceful Piggy Meditation" by Kerry L. MacLean and  "Puppy Mind" by Andrew J. Nance that teach slow down and breathe to become calm. I loan these to teachers and have a smaller set I loan to interested parents. Mindfulness is still pretty new in our school so there are many questions about how it is being taught. In addition to book resources I always recommend these sites:

mindfulschools.org and mindfulteachers.org  These sites have for practicing and teaching mindfulness, compassion, gratitude, and Social-Emotional Skills.

Thumballs

These are 4 of the Thumballs I have in my office. My newest ones are "Catch a Career" and "Mindfulness" from youthlight.com Youthlight offers a reduced cost the more you purchase.  Thumballs can be used in small groups using the basic directions: Throw it. Catch it. Respond to the panel under your thumb. You can vary the level of difficulty by requiring one answer or three to a prompt. Kids love "props" and tools they can touch. I have used Thumballs as an icebreaker and a wrap-up activity for groups in grades 2-5. I have some larger, easier to catch balls, that require less reading for kindergarten and grade 1. My favorite is "Mindfulness" that promotes discussion about key concepts and reinforces awareness including "The Present Is a Gift."

Back to School Books

Read alouds make children feel comfortable sharing and making connections to characters in text. These are a few of my favorite books about starting the new school year. It is a good time to introduce concepts about feelings that build empathy and emotion regulation. You can talk about pleasant and comfortable feelings the characters had (and the children willing to share about themselves) and unpleasant and uncomfortable feelings. Typical pleasant feelings about starting school are excited, happy, surprised and unpleasant include scared, nervous, worried, and disappointed. You can also teach the concept that feelings change over time by pointing out how characters felt the day before school starting vs. after the first day. I place books related to my "theme" of the month on the ledge of my white board so they are handy to grab if I need one or a teacher wants to borrow a book related to the theme.

Bad Signs

Alfie Kohn in his book Feel-bad Education (2011) has a thought-provoking chapter regarding what is on the walls in classrooms (and I think it can be applied to counseling offices as well). He believes that putting students on notice that they must have a positive attitude, etc. is not providing kids the safe place to learn that they need. He also feels the posters are too generic to be of any value. Kohn believes that if these posters are to be hung at least the students in the class should get to choose which ones will hang on the walls.  He thinks "Good Signs" in the learning environment are done by students, selections of their best work or information about them or the teacher. Kohn thinks its the students who should decide what goes on the walls, not the adult. It did make me stop to think about all the Pinterest inspired signs hanging on bulletin boards and in counselor's offices. Are they good or bad signs?

Mind Jar, Glass, or Bottle - Video or Prop to Explain Mind to Children

I am sure most of you have a glitter filled bottle or jar in your office that can be used as a calm down tool or like a timer (breathe until the glitter settles). This short video explains how thoughts and feelings are swirling most of the time in our minds, but mindful breathing or meditation can calm the mind. I am going to use this with my group for G 1 &2 who need help with mood regulation.

What to buy if setting up a counseling office from scratch

I would start be purchasing 5 good counseling games including:

Totika (which is counseling Jenga and has various decks of cards i.e., self-esteem, divorce)

Therapeutic/Counseling Dominoes Game Set (there are 7 - I like the Anger Control the best)
Talking, Feeling, Doing game
Ungame
Face It! Feeling cards
I would buy a silent timer, markers and colored pencils, dry erase markers and some small white boards, art paper, and a few fidget toys.
I love books but they are expensive and you can borrow them from school library, interlibrary loan, and some are available free online.
All counselors need a locked space to store confidential information but hopefully the school would provide this.

Book Categories - Organizing Children's Books

As part of packing my office for the end of the school year I was determined to finally do a book inventory and put all my books into categories so I can find what I need quickly. I also pulled out all the books I use for classroom lessons or sets for small groups. I had new shelf markers made with the following categories:

Academic Success

ADHD

Behavior

Bullying

Character Ed

College & Career Readiness

Diversity Awareness

Diversity – Special Needs

Dreams

Emotions

Emotions - Anger

Emotions Anxiety/Fear

Emotions - Bravery

Emotions - Sadness

Families

Families - Divorce

Families - Issues

Friendship Skills

Friendship - positive

Goals and Wishes

Gratitude

Grief

Kindness

Manners

Mindfulness

Perfectionism

Personal Safety

Problem Solving

Self-esteem

Self-regulation

Transitions

Wellness

I also have entered all the authors, titles, and categories into a Google Sheet. I will share that at a later date.

Where is the counselor?

We are using the iHelp theme with an iPAD as our new motto and brand for the school counseling program. We have added to our brochure, bulletin board, and this is the sign I made for the door of my office. I have gotten several compliments already.

Wobble Chair

I want some of these stools for my office. We have so many students who hate school because they are forced to sit upright in a chair most of the school day. Kids are frequently asked to sit way more than is good for them. These stools are better than exercise balls because they stay in one spot but allow the same type of movement. They are sold under the brand name "Kore Wobble Chair."